Daily Joke

by **tusoquero** Fri Feb 01, 2008 8:48 pm

Jill, a love-starved spinster, was so desperate that she went to
a local newspaper office and inquired about putting an advertisement
in the 'Lonely Hearts' column.
"Well, madam," the assistant said, "we charge a minimum of $1 per
insertion."
"You don't say," said the spinster "Well then, here's $20 and to hell
with the advertisement!"
1st February 2008

by **tusoquero** Sat Feb 02, 2008 4:40 pm

The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate embrace when there
came the sound of a key in the front door. The young lady broke away
at once, eyes wide with alarm.
"Heavens," she cried, "it's my husband! Quick, jump out the window."
The young man, equally alarmed, made a quick step toward the window,
then demurred. "I can't," he said, "we're on the thirteenth floor."
"For heaven's sake," cried the young lady in exasperation,
"is this a time to be superstitious?"
2nd February 2008

by **camhe22** Sat Feb 02, 2008 8:01 pm

wow bro tusoquero, is your jokes will be end of 14th february? hehehe keep on posting bro

by **tusoquero** Sun Feb 03, 2008 5:37 pm

A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him
and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me
back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart
and brave you are and how you are my hero" The man took the
frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me
back into a beautiful princess, I will be your loving companion
for an entire week." The man took the frog out of his pocket,
smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into
a princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want."
Again the man took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back
into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm
a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a year and do
anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have
time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."
03 February 2008

by **brooke_shields** Sun Feb 03, 2008 7:03 pm

Japanese archaeologist digging 100m down found copper wire - says
very good our great ancestors of 1000 yrs already had telephone.
AMERICANS dug 200m and found optical cable- says my God this means
our great forefathers already had broadband 2000 yrs ago.
PINOY digs 500m and found nothing- cympre ayaw patalo says anlupit
ng mga ninuno natin WIRELESS

by **k-e-e-n** Mon Feb 04, 2008 4:20 am

winona wrote:Japanese archaeologist digging 100m down found copper wire - says
very good our great ancestors of 1000 yrs already had telephone.
AMERICANS dug 200m and found optical cable- says my God this means
our great forefathers already had broadband 2000 yrs ago.
PINOY digs 500m and found nothing- cympre ayaw patalo says anlupit
ng mga ninuno natin WIRELESS

Lol, Is it wifi or bluetooth? lol!!

by **brooke_shields** Mon Feb 04, 2008 10:50 am

wifi

by **brooke_shields** Mon Feb 04, 2008 10:51 am

by **tusoquero** Mon Feb 04, 2008 3:06 pm

Monica Lewinsky's tell-all book about her affair with the U.S. President
has, for one Winnipeg Chapters outlet, not sold all that well after its
first day on the shelves, as reported by CBC Radio News.

To draw attention to the book, or to perhaps add some perspective, the
Lewinksy book had three other titles surrounding it on its display:

"Divorce for Dummies"
"100 Ways to Leave Your Lover"
"How to Remove Stains"
04 February 2008

by **tusoquero** Tue Feb 05, 2008 9:33 pm

A Jewish boy was walking with his girlfriend on the grounds of his
father's house. His father was a successful doctor, and was carrying out
a circumcision in the on-site surgery. As they were walking, they heard
a scream and a foreskin flew out of the window and landed at the girl's
feet.
"What's this," she asked.
"Taste it," he replied, "If you like it, I'll give you a whole one!"
05 February 2008

by **tusoquero** Wed Feb 06, 2008 2:25 pm

A Sunday school teacher asked her first graders.

"Where is God?"

The room was filled with children that raised their hands to respond.

"Okay, Mary, Where is God?"

"He is everywhere,"

"Very good that's right."

But still there were two children that didn't put their hands down,
so the teacher continued.

"Okay, Michael, Where is God?"

"God is inside me."

"Very good that's right."

Now there was one boy sitting in the back of the class waiving his hand.
He was the last child with his hand up, so the teacher called on him.

"Okay, Danny, Where is God?"

"He's in our bathroom."

Well the teacher just had to ask, "How do you know he's in the bathroom?"

The answer came, "Every morning my father knocks on the bathroom door? and says' My God are you still in there?? "
06 February 2008

by **tusoquero** Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:50 pm

There once was a priest who had to spend the night in a hotel and offered hat check girl to come up to his room for dinner.
After a while he started advancing on her when she stopped him and reminded him he was a holy man.

"It's O.K.," he replied, "it's written in the Bible."

So after a wild night of you-know-what the hat check girl asked to see where in the Bible it says it's okay.

The priest picks up the Bible off the dresser opens to the first page where someone wrote in pencil - "The hat check girl puts out!"
07 February 2008

by **carelyn** Fri Feb 08, 2008 3:23 am

bro. tusoquero i'm glad you share a daily jokes for us to be entertained...but i want to request you to please post it in a single topic inorder to give way for other members to post their reply. thank you very much!

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