Marriage Jokes ^^

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you
were dead.

***
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing
your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"

"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

***
A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband Wanted".
Next day,
she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can
have mine."

***
When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than
to let her keep him.

***
A woman is incomplete until she gets married. Then she is finished.

***
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married?"

Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

***
Young son: "Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man
doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"

Dad: "That happens in every country, son."

***

Then there was a woman who said, "I never knew what real happiness
was until I got married, and by then, it was too late."

***
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence

***
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every
word You say, talk in your sleep.

***
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life
thinking they had no faults at all.

***
First guy: "My wife's an angel!"

Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

***
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street

with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are attractive to the

opposite sex.

***
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children.

A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find
it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.

So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the
husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it
on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at
the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."

The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick,

We'd be riding the bus, so shut the hell up."


*** The End ***

lol nice collection of jokes..
i cant stop laughing on that angel joke..

whaaahahahha funny and scareddd together but need to select it!!! but im just prepared for what happen to me!!! thnx for sharing bro real joke!!!! toinkkkk

nyahaha :p ha :p ha :p what a funny funny joke collections . . . thanks alot bro and keep us always laugh nyahahaha

hehehehhe i like the first one.... its true ..... i'd rather die
thanks for the jokes!