IT WAS STILL A SECRET

I never knew just how much harm,
can be created by falling for ones charm.
I never knew you would take it this way,
that you would hate me so much in one day.
I thought i was doing good by telling you,
but it made things so hard and i am struggling to get through.
I know its hard on you and i know that you don't care,
i know i deserve it but why do you stand and stare.
You started off the mocking and then got other people to,
to stand there and look at me and say things that weren't true.
I know i kept it a secret for quite a long time,
but i needed to be sure that i wanted him as mine.
And then i told you my secret thinking it would be true,
it was, but in the end you still say to me i hate you.
I know you don't want to give me the time of day,
but this is my special poem to say,
that i know you hate me but i still love you,
after everything that we have had to go through.
This is the wrong time to tell you but things did not work out,
it wasn't ever love that i thought things were about.
So i wish it was still a secret and i wish you never knew,
but now its to late after everything i put you through.
But i will say it and get it in the air,
that i still love you and i still care.
I don't expect anything apart from you knowing,
that i still love you and i won't stop it showing.
You have heard it too many time before,
but i love you, maybe this time i love you more.
Because i know what its like for you not to be around,
and i loved to hear your breath, it was the sweetest sound.
But now all i hear is look at that girl she's not worth anything at all
but i will try and be here if ever you fall.
You may not want to know or just push me away,
but i can understand and i will still love you the same way.
I hope you still love me and accept that i was wrong,
but if not then thats fine and i will have to just be strong.
And deal with all the names and abusive talk,
and take a deep breath and just turn and walk.
And be who i am and be who i should be,
and smile at you even if you don't want to see.
So this is just the beginning of the hard times to come,
but i hope that you know that you were the one

The lake, half hidden by the trees
Is like my love for you.
Although we know it's there
It's almost hidden from our view.
The many shades of leaves
Are like the way I sometimes feel -
My moods in love are varied,
As colours are - dramatic -
As leaves are, very real.
The waters of the lake are deep,
And dark, and almost still -
Like that, I cannot speak of our love,
Not now, not yet, until . . .

Some brighter time will clear the way,
The waters will run bright,
Clear and sparkling for all to see -
No more as dark as night, and then one day
I'll talk about our love,
When freedom comes, and peace,
When I can hold you, unafraid -
And life seems not to cease.
Until then, perhaps the way ahead
Seems sad.
But life is not a carousel,
And often things seem bad.
Our love can wait, the hope is there,
And soon things will be fine,
One thing I ask - I ask it now,
Please let us have our time

a secret revealed, a word aptly spoken has made it clear.